18. Ill Will

Complete story — includes the ending

Will fears the scalpel when he enters the hospital for a tonsillectomy, while the family fears a steamy exposé when Geoffrey begins to write his memoirs. Will meets his roommate, Max Jakey ( Milton Berle ), a comedian who is lively despite being sick. Will has a nightmare where he gets treated by incompetent doctors ( Doctor Dré as himself, John Beradino as Dr. Steve Hardy, and Bernie Kopell as Dr. Adam Bricker). In fear, he disguises himself and sneaks out of the hospital. Meanwhile, in fear that Geoffrey's memoir might tell their secrets, Carlton and Hilary sneak into Geoffrey's room to try to find his memoirs. When Phil and Vivian enter the room, Carlton and Hilary hide under the bed, where they find Will. When Phil sits on the bed, the three reveal themselves. Phil sends Will back to the hospital. When he finds that Max isn't in the room, the nurse ( Debra Mooney ) tells Will that Max "went to a better place". Will, thinking Max died, shames himself for his cowardly actions and gains the confidence to get through the surgery. After Will's surgery, Geoffrey gives him a copy of his memoirs, which the Banks fight over trying to get it. Geoffrey reveals that his literary agent rejected the memoirs. Max shows up, much to the surprise of Will. Max explains that he was simply transferring to another hospital, Cedars-Sinai, having come back to retrieve his "lucky hat", which he usually drops on purpose and makes nurses pick it up so he can look at their behinds. However, Max changes his mind and decides to give it to Will.