7. Greener Pastor

Complete story — includes the ending

Early gets drunk and argues with a peaceful goateed stranger at the Waffle Barn. He injures himself by walking in front of a car, preventing the two from fighting each other. Early appears in church the next day, bandaged in multiple places, and brags about beating up the stranger, forcing him to buy him dinner and drive him home, none of which is true. Then the stranger steps to the front of the church and introduces himself as Kyle Nubbins, the new pastor, saying the reverend had left to go to "a better place....First Presbyterian of Blue Ridge." Kyle then plays his guitar and invites the church's congregation to a potluck in the evening. Early and Granny talk to each other at home about their dislike for Nubbins at home. At the potluck, Early accuses Kyle of being "pissed off" about losing the Waffle Barn fight the night before and throws food on the ground while cursing and insulting Nubbins. He leaves, taking food for himself when the Sheriff intervenes. Later on, the Cuylers show up to the church's fundraiser and Early dunks Nubbins in a tub of water without throwing the ball at the target, then points his sawed-off shotgun at Nubbins. Kyle quietly talks to Early, saying he understands Early's anger and instability and that alcohol won't help him. Early is baptized, then reveals that he hasn't changed as he steals all the fundraiser money. In church, Nubbins tells the congregation to close their eyes and allow the thief to return the money. When they open their eyes, however, not only did Early not return the money, he also steals Kyle's guitar. This reveals an ugly side of the pastor, cursing when he realizes that his "12 string" is gone. Nubbins walks up on Early, who is playing the guitar and singing at the Cuyler house. Early camoflouges himself, but forgets that his hat and the guitar reveal his position. Kyle rams Early against the wall and begins to choke him. The two calm down and meet in the church gym for a pushing contest in Sumo wrestler suits, which is Early's idea. However, Rusty (in the legs of the Cuyler suit) walks backwards, out of the circle. Sheriff tearfully tells Early that Early has to leave town, as he promised, but Early refuses, saying "I love this town with all of my heart, and it would take a 220 sasquatch to drag me from this town." The Sheriff then straps Early to a dog, which drags him away. Nubbins (apparently satisfied) walks off, saying to the crowd "We'll see you in church." Guest appearance: Jason Isbell as new reverend Kyle Nubbins Note: This episode was dedicated to the memory of the late Scott Hilley, who voiced The Reverend in the series. Theme song performer: Jimmy Cliff