Complete story — includes the ending
Randy is bullied at school because of his squid tentacles. Early and Granny teach Randy how to use his tentacles to fight back. The next day, Randy violently hurts two bullies by ramming his tentacles up their butts and through their mouths. This leads to fear in the school and Tammi tells the three Cuylers that she's talked to the doctor about surgically removing Randy's squid parts. This surprises them and Early asks Tammi for 24 hours to show her that Randy is a good squid. He teaches Randy how to get out of work, to disobey orders, to rob Boyd's store, and demonstrates squirting ink when angry. When Randy fails to squirt ink at a cardboard cutout of Bill Clinton, Early and Granny become indifferent and tell Rusty to "let his mama cut off them wigglers...He ain't one of us." Rusty and Randy leave and Rusty tells Tammi that she's right, surgery is the best option, but she informs him that the surgery is too expensive for her to afford. Wanting to provide for his son, Rusty steals one of his father's trucks and sells it online. Unfortunately, Randy's surgery doesn't help anything as his tentacles grow back. Early wakes up and calls the Sheriff to search for his truck. Deputy Denny shows up driving the truck, revealing that he bought it online. Early and Denny argue and draw their guns, causing Sharif to draw two pistols. A Mexican standoff ensues, with no one shooting. Denny explains (after a lot of yelling) that Rusty sold the truck to him online but Early refuses to believe it. Rusty walks up and reveals that he actually did, saying "because I'm a squid: I steal, I don't take orders from nobody." Early tells his son that he's proud of him, knowing "you was always a good squid." Taking advantage of the distraction, Denny rides off in the truck, hoping to keep it. Early, Rusty, and Randy follow. Denny leaps out of his house with his pistols drawn just as Early is breaking into his truck. Randy sprays ink all over Denny, then inserts his tentacles up Denny's butt and through his mouth, then beats him. This makes the other two squids happy until blood starts pouring. Early drives the three of them home. Theme song performer: Rebecca Schiffman
Sources and content license
Source and revision history · Adapted from Wikipedia contributors, List of Squidbillies episodes. HTML formatting and reference markers removed. · Content license