Season 3

Complete listed story — includes the ending

1. The Drake and Josh Inn

Audrey and Walter head to Los Angeles for a Spring Break vacation, leaving Drake and Josh in charge of the house. On top of this, the adults leave them $200 strictly for food and emergencies only. However, Drake immediately decides to spend the money on toys and other unnecessary items. Desperate for more money, Drake wants to temporarily turn their house into a bed and breakfast after he notices a vacationing couple who has no place to stay. Josh is initially hesitant, as he is furious at Drake over his greedy spending, but reluctantly agrees, seeing as they need money for food. Megan also agrees to go along with the ruse, so long as she is also treated like a guest. The situation then quickly deteriorates when Drake invites a crowd of partying college students to stay in the hopes of making even more money. Things worsen when MTV starts broadcasting from inside their house. Audrey and Walter then become suspicious when they see their house on television and begin heading home. However, with the help of Megan, Drake and Josh successfully force everyone to leave and manage to clean up the house before Walter and Audrey arrive. Unfortunately, Audrey and Walter are then mistakenly arrested for their alleged involvement in the party's unauthorized broadcast.

2. Peruvian Puff Pepper

Josh enters a salsa making contest and asks Drake to help him in order to win the grand prize – a brand-new, flat-screen television set. Megan also wants to help her brothers win the TV in exchange for sharing it between the whole family. However, the boys decline, selfishly wanting to keep the TV all to themselves. Megan then sabotages their salsa in retaliation, causing it to explode all over the kitchen, with the boys taking all the blame from Audrey and Walter. Drake and Josh, sick of always being Megan's victims, then try to find some proof of her deviousness, and discover a surveillance panel inside her room, only for them to get in more trouble when the panel is hidden as they attempt to show their parents. Megan then enters the salsa contest on her own and obtains a "Peruvian Puff Pepper", an extremely rare pepper that could guarantee her victory. Upon learning this, the boys steal the pepper and use it in their salsa instead. Drake and Josh go on to win the contest, but they are soon disqualified when they reveal their secret ingredient at Megan's request, leading to them being informed that Peruvian Puff Peppers are deemed illegal in the United States, due to them causing kidney failure and chapped lips. Megan, declared the winner as the runner-up, is accused by her brothers of setting them up, but she convinces them that she is not that smart enough to do so. In the end, Megan watches the duo repainting the kitchen following the earlier incident as a wrongful punishment from their parents through the television set.

3. We're Married

Josh's foreign pen pal, Yooka ( Anastasia Baranova ), comes to visit from her homeland of Yudonia, wherein Drake immediately takes a strong liking to her, spending more time with her than Josh can. Eventually, Drake promises to back off, however he and Josh soon learn that Yooka is homesick. So the boys arrange a Yudonian friendship ceremony in the hopes of lifting her spirits. However, this turns out to actually be a wedding ceremony between Yooka and Drake. Drake tries to carry on with life as normal, however Yooka is serious about being married (revealing that they mistranslated her saying "sick of home", instead of "homesick"), and matters worsen when Yooka's parents come to visit. So Drake and Josh come up with a plan to annul the marriage, serving her family goat, which is a sacred animal in Yudonia. However, Drake quickly regrets the plans after he learns that Yooka's father is a billionaire. The plan works, with Yooka's father ending the marriage and their whole family returning to Yudonia, much to Drake's sorrow. During the end credits, it is revealed that Josh and Yooka are still e-pals and that Yooka's father bought the Boston Red Sox for Yooka's new boyfriend and fiancé Achboo, causing Drake's sorrow to worsen.

4. Mindy's Back

Mindy Crenshaw returns to school from a mental institution after her long suspension is lifted, following the events of the episode "Honor Council". On top of this, Mindy once again beats Josh in the school's annual science fair. On the advice from Megan, Josh attempts to simply ignore her — until Mindy willingly chooses him as her partner for a science project. Josh is initially annoyed by this, however the two eventually realize they have feelings for one another and begin to date. Despite this, Josh is too worried to tell Drake about their relationship, due to Drake and Mindy's hatred for one another and Drake's resentment towards Mindy for attempting to have him suspended. When Mindy finds out that Josh has not yet told Drake about them, she decides that she cannot be with Josh and the two break up. When Drake finally finds out, he reveals that he is actually happy for Josh and helps to reunite the pair by taking Josh to Mindy's house in the middle of the night, where Josh and Mindy reconcile and finally share their first kiss through Mindy's bedroom window.

5. The Affair

Drake and Josh notice that Walter has recently begun to act strangely. After some further eavesdropping, Drake and Josh convince themselves that Walter may be having an affair with another woman. In the hopes of fixing things, the brothers attempt to make Walter fall in love with Audrey all over again by preparing his favorite meal for him, while simultaneously telling Walter that the meal was prepared by Audrey. Unfortunately, this plan backfires after Drake accidentally puts cumin in the food, which Walter is deathly allergic to. This leads to a heated argument between Walter and Audrey, which only makes the situation worse. Later, with the help of Megan, Drake and Josh discover that Walter plans to meet with a woman named Peggy ( Allison Dunbar ) at a nearby restaurant. After following Walter to the restaurant, Drake and Josh try to convince Peggy to leave their father alone. However, Peggy refuses, so the boys dump food on her in retaliation, causing her to leave in a rage. A furious Walter then reveals that Peggy is actually a producer for the national morning show Good Morning Today, and that she was talking with Walter about potentially being the show's new weatherman. As retribution for costing him the job, Walter forces a guilty Drake and Josh to dump food on themselves as punishment.

6. Playing the Field

Drake attempts to break up with Tori ( Torrey DeVitto ), his latest girlfriend. However, Tori breaks up with Drake first, which seriously confuses Drake (as he is usually the one who ends things when it comes to relationships). When Drake then learns that Tori has already moved on and is dating other guys, Drake attempts to make her jealous by going on a date with another girl, "Hot" Liza Tupper. Meanwhile, Josh grows a mustache, which nobody approves of, including Mindy, who attempts to goad Josh into shaving it off.

7. Helen's Surgery

Drake and Josh are tasked with assisting Helen after eye surgery leaves her temporarily blind. After driving her home, Drake and Josh find that Helen's apartment is filled with luxurious accessories, such as a hot tub and a huge flat-screen TV, due to Helen receiving royalties from a sitcom entitled "Happy Times", that she starred in as a child. When Helen then accidentally takes too much of her pain medication, she becomes severely drowsy and incoherent. To make matters worse, Josh then accidentally loses Helen's eye drops down her sink, forcing him to go to the pharmacy to replace them. When Drake then leaves a loopy Helen alone at her apartment, Josh runs into Drake at their home, chastising Drake for abandoning Helen in her vulnerable state. When the boys return to Helen's apartment, they find that Helen is gone, prompting a frantic search. Eventually, Josh receives a call from Megan, wherein Megan explains that she found Helen at the park and brought her to their home, after which Josh goes to retrieve her. Once Josh and Helen arrive back at Helen's apartment, however, Josh finds that Drake has taken advantage of Helen's blindness and has thrown a huge party at her apartment, much to Josh's disapproval. Helen is then called by her eye doctor informing her to take the patches off her eyes. When she does so, she finds Drake's party currently in progress. However, when Josh goes to throw Drake under the bus and tell Helen everything that happened, Helen instead believes that Drake threw the party specifically for her out of kindness, and she allows it to continue. Meanwhile, Megan pitches an idea to Helen for a bucket-shaped container that conveniently stores most movie theater snacks called "Cup-O-Stuff", whch Josh ridcules her for, believing it is impractical. Once the idea is a success, however, Megan earns $700 to Josh's dismay.

8. Paging Dr. Drake

While working out, Josh drops a barbell on his left foot and seriously injures it after Drake accidentally shoots him with a potato using a launching gun. Despite this, Josh tries to conceal the injury from Walter and Audrey, as he is scared of going to the hospital. When Walter and Audrey find out, however, Josh is forced to go to the hospital, where he is told that his injury will require surgery. At the hospital, Drake attempts to get close to the female nurses by illegally impersonating a doctor, which leads to everyone mistaking Drake for an actual young doctor named Dr. Nussbaum, who is due to arrive to the hospital that day. Drake now has to avoid being caught by Josh's doctor ( John O'Hurley ) and ends up having to perform a foot surgery, prompting Josh to intervene and bail him out. Eventually, Drake is caught when the real Dr. Nussbaum arrives. In a last act of desperation, Drake jumps out the window, breaking his arm in the process. Meanwhile, Megan plots revenge on her brothers for not letting her turn up the heat, since the house's thermostat is located in the boys' bedroom. As retaliation, Megan then rewires the thermostat, causing the temperature to become so low inside Drake and Josh's room that it begins to actually snow indoors.

9. The Foam Finger

While reminiscing, Drake and Josh suddenly remember that they previously met eight years prior to becoming stepbrothers during a San Diego Padres game when they were both children, having fought over buying the last foam finger at the stadium. This quickly leads to an argument, wherein Drake and Josh both believe that the other started the fight, and flashback scenes depict different circumstances based on their own memory of the event. Josh believes that Drake intentionally hit him in the back of his head with the foam finger after purchasing it, while Drake vehemently denies this and claims that Josh attacked him first. The two brothers then drift apart after a massive fight, which results in Josh ripping the foam finger apart in a fit of rage. This prompts Drake to move out of their bedroom and into Megan's bedroom. Eventually, Megan locates the clerk who sold the foam finger ( Fred Stoller ). He explains that it was actually Megan who threw a cookie towards the boys from her stroller, hitting Josh in the back of the head and therefore starting the fight. After learning the truth and reconciling, the episode ends with Drake and Josh imagining how their lives will be at old age.

10. Girl Power

Drake plans to break up with his latest girlfriend Lucy ( Gabrielle Christian ) when he finds out that she is stronger than he is, after Lucy beats up some jocks that were picking on them. However, Drake instead decides to challenge Lucy to a wrestling match to prove that he is tougher than she is. Meanwhile, Josh attempts to impress Mindy's uptight parents, seeking their approval so he can continue to date her. After a dinner at the Crenshaws' house goes horribly wrong, Josh decides to invite the Crenshaws over for a fancy dinner of his own as a last resort – on the same night as Drake and Lucy's fight. Concerned that their fight will ruin his chances of impressing Mindy's parents, Josh forces Drake and Lucy to wrestle upstairs in the boys' bedroom, where Megan is waiting to watch the fight with a group of her friends. However, during the dinner, Drake and Lucy make their way downstairs and into the living room, where Josh furiously yells at Drake for ruining everything. In the midst of all this, Mindy's parents come to realize just how much Josh cares for their daughter, and allow her and Josh to resume their relationship. However, once they find out what Drake and Lucy were fighting over, Mindy's parents argue whether women are stronger than men, and fight it out in front of everyone.

11. Sheep Thrills

After investigating a strange noise in their garage, Drake and Josh find that Megan has bought a pet sheep online, which she has named "Baaahhb". Megan then convinces Drake and Josh to help her hide the sheep in their bedroom, while she thinks of a way to explain the situation to Walter and Audrey. In exchange, she promises not to pull any pranks on them for three months. However, when the sheep later gives birth to a lamb on Drake's bed and then wanders out of the room, Drake and Josh must then hide the sheep from their parents while Megan is at oboe practice. However, their secret is discovered when Walter and Audrey bust into their bedroom, demanding an explanation for the boys' strange behavior, to which Drake and Josh attempt to rightly explain that the whole situation is Megan's fault. Of course, Megan then enters and claims to know nothing about the sheep, resulting in Drake and Josh being grounded for a month. On the night before they are lifted from their punishment, the boys discover that Megan has now bought a pet zebra, to which they choose not to have anything to do with it.

12. Megan's New Teacher

After being accepted into "Tomorrow's Teachers Today", a student-teaching program, Josh becomes Megan's new chemistry teacher temporarily. However, Josh takes his new job seriously and soon abuses his teaching skills, as he challenges the students with college-level chemistry (something that they are not old enough to comprehend) and even fails the students on pop quizzes based on homework that they were mentally incapable of doing. Because of this, Megan quickly becomes alienated by her classmates due to being Josh's sister, and is even uninvited to her friend Katie's birthday party, which includes a piñata made in Josh's likeness. Meanwhile, Drake befriends a boy in Megan's class named Neil Kramer, who has a natural talent for playing drums. After discovering this, Drake asks Neil to play for his band on Friday at The Premiere's anniversary party after his original drummer quit. However, Neil's mom forbids him since he failed Josh's pop quiz, leading Drake to also be annoyed at Josh. Drake and Megan then scheme to have Josh fired from the student-teaching program by sneaking into the school late at night, replacing Josh's safe chemical with one that will instantly explode when combined with anything, while also replacing Josh's video about compunds with a video of clowns and unscrewing the sink's faucet so that it will spray water when turned. In the end, Josh is fired and Neil plays with Drake in the concert. However, Megan and her classmates then gift a trophy to Josh, calling him their favorite teacher, seeing as him screwing up his teaching job caused their class's regular teacher, Ms. Hunter (whom they all hated), to quit. The children then admit that Josh is cool, not as a teacher, but as a friend, which Josh delightfully accepts.

13. Little Sibling

Mrs. Hayfer attempts to punish Drake for lying to her about being late to class one too many times by sending him to Remedial English, a class filled with unruly and dangerous students. In order to avoid this, Drake agrees to participate in the "Little Sibling Foundation", being matched up with a boy named Sammy. However, Drake immediately drives Sammy away with his lazy and negligent behavior, causing Sammy to befriend Josh instead. Josh and Sammy then proceed to have lots of fun together, such as filming a pretend cooking show where, while recording, Josh tells Sammy how most people who know Drake and Josh normally see Drake as the cool one of the two, and that it's nice to have things the other way around. A desperate Drake then makes one last attempt to interest Sammy in order to avoid his punishment, bribing Sammy with a four-wheeler and tickets to a magic show. Although he succeeds, Drake soon regrets his decision after seeing how depressed Josh is over losing Sammy. Drake's regret then worsens after he watches the recording of Josh and Sammy's cooking show and hears Josh's confession to Sammy, in the process realizing what Sammy truly means to Josh. The next day, Drake then tells Sammy that he is not feeling well, allowing Sammy and Josh to attend the magic show instead. However, Josh then overhears Drake talking to Megan, wherein Drake confesses that he feigned the illness so that Josh and Sammy could spend time together. As a result of being unsuccessful with Sammy, Drake is then sent to Remedial English, however Josh enters and rescues his brother as a sign of gratitude for letting Sammy spend time with him.

14. Theater Thug

Josh lands the role of a notorious robber known as the "Theater Thug" for a crime drama television series entitled "FBI's Most Wanted", with the re-enactment segment being filmed at The Premiere. However, after the episode airs, Josh is then mistaken by the entirety of San Diego for the actual thief, causing him to be repeatedly beaten up and arrested. Drake, on the other hand, receives endless praise from people, despite only having a three-second appearance and uttering only one line. Eventually, one night at The Premiere during closing, the real Theater Thug comes in and attempts a robbery. Drake and Josh manage to subdue him, but when the police arrive, they once again mistake Josh for the robber and arrest him instead, allowing the real Theater Thug to escape. Special guest star: Josh Server as Jeff Carlson, the crime show's director.

15. The Demonator

Drake and Josh plan to ride a new roller coaster called "The Demonator" on its opening day. However, they instead find out that the ride will actually open that night. Complicating things further, the boys are then tasked by Audrey and Walter to stay home and watch over their great-grandfather, Papa Nichols, who recently had surgery, while Walter and Audrey attend an awards show. As a way out, Drake calls two friends from school, Craig Ramirez and Eric Blonowitz, to come over and convinces them to watch Papa Nichols while he, Josh, and Megan – who has blackmailed Drake and Josh into taking her – go off to ride the Demonator. Sometime later, Papa Nichols wakes up disoriented, believing that he is back in World War II and that Craig and Eric are German soldiers, in which he proceeds to attack them and evens breaks Eric's cell phone when he believes it to be a weapon. Meanwhile, while waiting to ride the Demonator, Drake, Josh and Megan are bumped to the back of the line after Josh attempts to reclaim his spot in line after using the restroom, upsetting the other parkgoers. Later, Drake and Josh are bumped back in line once again after Josh is falsely accused of messing with the amusement park's mascot, wherein Megan takes the opportunity to remain in line by pretending not to know them. After Megan rides the Demonator first, Drake and Josh finally get to ride the Demonator and arrive home just seconds before Audrey and Walter do. Suddenly, Papa Nichols wakes up and punches Walter, knocking him out and calling him a German.

16. Alien Invasion

Megan, who was just gifted a brand new telescope, uses Josh's laptop and Drake's leather jacket without their permission. When Drake and Josh attempt to take their things back from Megan, she gets them sent to their room after convincing Walter that both of them bullied her and pushed her down. Enraged, the boys then hatch a plan to pull their own prank on Megan. Using photoshop, they insert a false image of an alien spaceship onto the laptop screen. Megan falls for the ruse and believes that aliens are invading. Drake and Josh then have Eric rewire their kitchen so that they can control the appliances inside, which frightens Megan and convinces her even further that aliens are real. Drake and Josh continue to try to prove to Megan that aliens are invading and, when Megan is left home alone one night, they pose as aliens and have their comeuppance on her. Just as Drake and Josh begin celebrating, though, a seemingly actual alien shows up that turns out to be a friend of Megan's and scares the duo away, much to Megan's delight. Leaving her brothers to their own fear as her retribution against them, Megan and her friend then hang out together in the house as her parents return, with the "alien" scaring Walter upon meeting him.

17. Dr. Phyllis Show

Drake and Josh have been constantly arguing more than usual, including late at night. Fed up with being awoken due to their bickering, Megan books her brothers as guests on the Dr. Phyllis Show (a parody of Dr. Phil ), hoping that its eponymous hostess ( Gabrielle Carteris ) can end their feud once and for all. On the show, Dr. Phyllis has the boys reminisce about fights they have had in the past. When Josh mentions that Drake once dated a girl named "Hot" Liza Tupper to make his ex-girlfriend Tori jealous (from the episode "Playing the Field") as an example of how Drake takes advantage of everyone, Drake confirms that the story is true and insults Liza by calling her "dumb" and "a bad kisser". Liza Tupper, however, happens to be Dr. Phyllis's daughter, sending Dr. Phyllis in such a rage that she physically attacks Drake on air, and even attacks Josh when he tries to stop her. Once they return home, the brothers realize that they were only recalling the bad memories they have had together, even though they have had plenty of good memories as well. Drake and Josh then reconcile after reminiscing on the good times they have had, but soon end up in another heated argument as a result of a small beverage mix-up. Upon hearing this, Megan furiously sets off an incapacitating agent -laden smoke bomb to render her brothers unconscious and finally have some peace and quiet.